A Ranking Of The Top 5 Media Buffets I've Been To
I’m about to share some secrets, but first, I’m going to ask that you subscribe to this newsletter. I’ll drop gold in to your email. Gold. Most, including this, will be free. But the greatest stuff will not be.
I'm going to fill you in on a little secret.
The best part about being a journalist is not going to games. It's not the networking. It's not getting to know important people. It's not attending training sessions and press conferences and mixed zones. It's not going to cool stadiums you would have otherwise never gone to.
It's the food.
(I'm totally not serious. It *is* all those aforementioned things. Not the food.)
OK the real secret is actually this: The food is actually very important, but it's kind of one of those things none of us can admit, because it would be a bit unprofessional to do so. But I'm here to tell you that secretly, we are all either very excited or not very excited to show up to a stadium early depending on what the situation is. Will there be a buffet? Will there be a lunch bag? How is the coffee? Will there be dessert? A soda machine? Glass bottles of Coca-cola? Is the coffee freshly brewed from whole beans, or is it instant? Are we getting tea bags or steeped tea? Are there options for everyone (carnivores, vegans, celiacs) or is it a 'take it or leave it'? Will the food be replenished at half-time? What time will they take the food away? Are there enough seats in the media room to sit down and enjoy the meal without feeling rushed?
It breaks my heart, but Estadio Santiago Bernabeu did not make the cut for this shortlist. The Bernabeu experience is awesome -- one I'll never get tired of -- but it's also not the most media friendly.
Here is my Bernabeu index:
Staff: 5 stars
Food: N/A
Real Madrid does not provide the media with food. They used to give free hot coffee and free hot chocolate, but since the renovations, they replaced the free hot coffee and free hot chocolate with a vending machine where you have to buy hot coffee and hot chocolate. Now, mind you, the coffee is about 60 cents, but it's the principle -- you have to have coins on you and there's typically a line-up, and the machine is slow, and difficult to figure out, so everyone in line takes longer than they should because they're confused about how the machine works. So you have to weigh whether it's worth it or not, whereas before there was no thinking involved -- you just pour yourself a coffee, no questions asked, no decision-making fatigue involved.
There is one exception to the food situation at the Bernabeu: UEFA requires them to provide food for media on Champions League nights, so they oblige, and give each journalist a paper bag with an apple, a ham croissant, a container of pasta salad, and a chocolate bar.
(Again, I am a grown man who gets to do fun things for work, writing about a paper bag at the Bernabeu. Clown Emoji Clown Emoji Clown Emoji.)
Now it's time to get the meat and gravy -- what you're been waiting for. A ranking of the top five media buffets I've been to:
5. American Airlines Arena
Coming in at number five, fresh in my memory from a recent trip to Dallas where I went on a mission to ask Luka Doncic about Real Madrid (below), the American Airlines Arena. I got into the stadium early enough to have several rounds at the buffet before the game started. Here are the top five items from the spread:
5. Garden salad (basic but a very essential item to have)
4. Fried rice
3. Soda fountain
2. Tiramisu
1. Build your own tacos
Build your own tacos is exactly what you think it is. You take as many corn tortillas as you wish, and put anything you want on it: Pico de gallo, guacamole, pulled chicken, beans, rice.
The tiramisu was a giant bowl that got replenished regularly.
Those two items alone gets you into the top five.
4. Scotiabank Arena
Before I covered Real Madrid, I covered the Toronto Raptors, which meant frequent trips to the Air Canada Center (now Scotiabank Arena).
Here's what was on tap in the media room: Pizza from Pizza Pizza, a chef cutting roast beef, and a salad bar.
Now, pizza from Pizza Pizza isn't good, but when it's unlimited, there's a charm to it. And roast beef being cut by a chef is an immediate ceiling raiser for a buffet.
3. Etihad
The Etihad. State of the art. Manchester City fans exited the stadium in record time the moment Antonio Rüdiger slotted home the winning penalty (and then rightfully went crazy celebrating) as the travelling Madridistas took over -- BUT, the stadium is great. I have zero complaints from the Etihad experience, including the food, which was A+.
There is an entire vegan section. The last time I was there, it was Chinese food night. The vegan section included: sweet & sour "ribs", fried rice, and mixed vegetables.
2. Anfield
The greatness of Anfield comes down to two things in particular that sets it apart from other stadiums on this list (and only comes second because #1 on this list has two things that are truly extraordinary): 1) They replenish the spread with new dessert at half-time; and 2) You get the added bonus of bringing your tea, coffee, and / or food to the press row while watching, LIVE, 61, 000 people singing ‘You'll Never Walk Alone’.
Most buffets wrap it up by half-time. Anfield ramps it up at half-time. And, de facto, no other stadium has a live rendition of ‘You'll Never Walk Alone’.
1. Stamford Bridge
I would pay to have dinner at Stamford Bridge. I would reserve it ahead of time, probably months in advance, notify my family, invite my closest friends, and we'd all load up at the buffet before sitting awkwardly in scattered chairs arranged in auditorium seating. We'd face the press conference banner but not each other. There are no mics -- you have to shout. We won't hear each other. There will be chaos, a lot of stimulation -- but that's part of the charm. It's like when you enter a Chinese restaurant and the owner is in the back eating, their kids are there doing homework, and they get up from their homework to take your order at the cash. Those are the good Chinese restaurants. At Stamford Bridge, we're not there to talk, we're there to eat.
What's your first stop? Blue cheese and walnuts (extraordinary thing number one) from the charcuterie board? Fresh, crisp, leafy greens with balsamic glaze? Roast beef? Roasted vegetables and rice? Perhaps you'd like to stop at the build-your-own-tiramisu bar (extraordinary thing number two)? Yes, the build-your-own-tiramisu bar is a real thing that exists at Stamford Bridge.
Bonus points for press row being basically on top of the pitch, close enough that you can hear what the coaches are yelling. (And the away section is right behind the goal, so when Real Madrid scores it feels like they’ve taken over the whole stadium.)
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